By Lawrence Mitchell
Relationship Correspondent
http://www.askmen.com/dating/dating_advice_100/107_dating_tips.html
Machiavellian: Suggesting the principles of conduct laid down by Machiavelli; marked by cunning, duplicity or bad faith.
The Italian philosopher Niccolo Machiavelli, author of Il Principe ( The Prince ), was an exponent of unscrupulous action in the pursuit of political power. His view was that the world of politics was inherently amoral and that as a result, there were no rules. While not a benevolent maxim, it is not altogether illogical even today. When you operate within a dishonorable system, it is reasonable to achieve authority and dominance by any means necessary.
Of course, love and relationships are not amoral pursuits, although some might disagree. Nor will I pretend that they are comparable to the cesspool of corruption that Machiavelli wrote about some 500 years ago in his landmark treatise. Men today can benefit however, from the great philosopher's advice on how to win influence and gain power over others. In this case, "others" refers to women. How convenient.
First you get the women
The topic at hand is as a result, how to manipulate women and get your way. This is what men try to do on a regular basis but with calamitous results. The hold they have on their significant others is so temporary, so weak and so deceptive, that before they even sense it, their woman has them by the balls again.
Is it amoral, as the political reality of Machiavelli was, to dispense this advice? Is it wrong? How can a man and woman foster a lifetime commitment on trust and respect when one is out to manipulate the other for personal gain and satisfaction? Simple. She must never know your intentions or methods to influence her mind.
With wily deceit, you must approach this technique like a martial art: discipline, prudence and stealth are your friends. But whereas in practice martial arts seek to exploit the physical leverage of an opponent to gain the advantage, female mind manipulation in the context of a relationship must use mental leverage to do the same.
Despite the cloak of Machiavellian wisdom, female mind manipulation borrows from the restraint of Confucius, the quiet ruthless practices of Sun Tzu and the meditation of Zen. If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there, does it make a sound? If you bend your woman to your will and she is oblivious to the fact, did you even manipulate her mind in the first place? Think about it.
Do you have to be a Jedi Knight of the subconscious to pull this off? Does it have to be this complex? Well to be honest with you, yes. Women are intricate creatures and, unless vulnerable because of innate insecurity, trauma or low intelligence, resist deception with maddening ease.
They question our judgment. They question our expertise. They question our intelligence. They question our taste. It drives us absolutely crazy. In our quest to carve a better life, all we want is an impression of obedience and submission to our masculine dominance.
And I think we deserve it if we earn it. You have to earn it. Otherwise you give real men who know how to control their women with a soft hand and sharp mind a bad name. So here's what you do:
Be a contender, not a pretender...
In order to exert influence and win infinite support from your woman, you need to hold a position of worth in life. You have to stand for something significant. You have to command reverence in your respective field. People should respect your dignity and moral resilience. Why? Simple. Women gravitate toward men of strong character and go to bat for them time and time again. You can be a university professor, a neurosurgeon or a janitor. It matters not. Just be the man who people turn to for advice, counsel and wisdom.
Bend like a reed
Stop me if you know this one:
If a stronger enemy assails you,
better bend like the reed by the stream.
Do not rear like an angry snake
if unremitting prosperity is what you seek.
Following the lowly manner of the reed
a man gains great prosperity in time.
Adopting the overbearing manner of the snake,
he is simply courting death.
*Excerpt from Pancatantra
Your woman may not be a "stronger enemy" or even an enemy at all. There are times however, when she may prove to be a stubborn and formidable adversary. Apply the advice above in order to scuttle convention and curry her favor and loyalty. Remember the moral at hand. Better to bend like a reed than attack like a snake. The reed is buoyant, pliable and endures with time. Mighty oaks may break in a vicious storm, but reeds stand firm and last.
Condition your woman
You have to think like Pavlov in order to condition your woman to behave the way you desire. Your woman may expect you to bark orders at her, criticize her or become angry when she upsets you. But you choose to remain quiet, cast her an intense gaze and speak in a soft tone. Again, you are a reed. In a quarrel or conflict, if you transmit the depth of your disappointment, anger and even rage toward your woman in a cool and quiet manner, not only will you scare her straight, you will gain immeasurable respect and obedience. In good times, when the two of you are in bliss, express your love with as much warmth as possible. Be spontaneous and romantic. Make love to her. Be the man and be her man.
In other words, reward her with affection and attention when she warrants it. Make it comfortable, easy and to her great advantage to submit to you.
Draw her natural feminine instincts out
I'll let you in on a secret: Women want men who take control, not men who are control freaks. The difference is important. Control freaks are narcissists who put their desires and needs first. Men who take control are protectors and leaders. The satiation of their desires and needs are the natural result of the effortless and invisible control they wield. Men who take control take care of their women. They treat them like royalty. They shelter them from harm. They love them and they are loyal. But with a stern voice and demeanor and an unflappable charisma, they engender passionate loyalty in return.
A woman who displays the latter will do anything for her man. She will be a whore in the bedroom, a good mother to his children, a partner in business or in crime, and a fierce defender to his detractors.
The Clint Eastwood tour de force Mystic River has a scene at the end between Sean Penn and Laura Linney that best demonstrates the theory in discussion. In a display of impressive spousal devotion, Linney assures her husband of her steadfast support in the face of a heinous crime. Incredulous, Penn rests his head on the bed as his wife expresses her allegiance and obedience with not only words, but also aggressive sexual advances. "You are the King," she whispers.
How did Sean Penn's character provoke such loyalty in his wife? He was a man who took care of his family. Their respect and the respect of his peers were absolute and pure. As a result, his wife, while no pushover and a strong character in her own right, was ready to exercise his whims and let him lead.
Then you get the power
Be a real man and apply the advice in this article in order to manipulate the mind of your woman and gain control in your relationship. Remember; manipulation is neither cruel nor wrong if you love her. It is wise.
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